Mar 23, 2004

Life can be interesting sometimes. Well, if it's my life, it's one dramatic escapade after another; just ask my boss. We were joking about that last week; it seems as soon as something calms down, the next thing flares right up. It's usually not good stuff, but I did find the humor in my situation. I'm extremely lucky I work in a place that gives me such leniency in the use of my personal and sick leave. I was so depressed at the beginning of last year I needed to take a few days off to hole up in my room and try to forget about Reid. Luckily Tony came right along less than a month later and took my mind of things, and reminded me what a truly wonderful man is all about. Then no sooner than later, I get so sick, my ears get so blocked, I experience vertigo, severe neck pain and eye pain; yet every otalarynalogist in this city couldn't find what was wrong with me. I missed more than two weeks of work because of that one. My ears are starting to bother me yet again now and I worry that it's going to start up. You'd think I'd have allergies, but no, I've seen the Allergist too; not to mention chiropractors, homeopaths, name it, I've seen them. I received a wonderful father's blessing from my uncle last June and he told me then that I had to be patient, but I would be healed. I just had to find the right specialist who would be willing to help me. And man, I have tried. I even went in for a physical and pap this morning and talked to my doctor about it as well. While she did increase my antidepressant mg, she couldn't help me with the stupid ears. I went to the supposedly best ear, nose and throat doctor in the city (that was within my HMO of course) and even he pooed pooed it off. I'm so frustrated, but I just try to deal. I believe in my blessing; it's just going to take time and hopefully meeting the right specialist.

Anyway, yeah, we were joking around about it. At least this break-up hasn't caused me to need to stay home and wallow in self-pity. I was determined from the get-go to not do that. Alright, I did spend three days in North Carolina, but big deal. By this time my boss expects it, hahaha:) I had to admit, well, at least my life isn't boring!!! :)

So I have this beta named Wills sitting in my bathroom. He's a funny fish; if you have ever seen a beta, they always look pissed off. But he is a sweetheart and he even will eat from my hand. YES, from my hand! I'm watching him for Gilly while she is in Scotland. She had forgotten that I have cats so poor Wills has to stay in the bathroom. But it's alright; he keeps me entertained while I'm getting dressed after showering. I guess he even does tricks:)

Then there's Mikel; now declawed and neutered, who still runs up and down the stairs and terrorizes Vader. But they are friends now. They both LOVE to cuddle at night. He will just come right up into my arms (if Vader isn't already there) and nuzzle me and fall asleep with his nose right in the crook between my cheek and my own nose. What a doll. Having animals sure helps one to be appreciative and feel so much less stress. It's wonderful being loved so unconditionally. As long as you feed them and clean out their litter box, and cuddle them at night, they are yours forever.

Cristina finally moved in. Well kind of. She is still job hunting but at least she came down from Rhinelander so I can help her. I got her computer up and running on the wireless network so now she can be a geek like the rest of us and carry her computer around the house:)

I have to start going to institute if I want to keep my parking space, which I definitely need. I work late and am just too tired after work so I don't want to go to the 7pm one, so I am going to try to make myself go to the 8am class. There are only like 4 people there, which will be cool, and we're studying doctrine of the prophets. That should be interesting. If I can just make myself get up at 6:30 once a week and stay awake during class, this would be good for me health-wise as well as spiritually. Then tomorrow night Laurie and I are heading to the Princeton Club to check it out and get our free week. That place is gigantic..the tour alone will probably take us more than an hour. But then Roberto is going to give us a free work-out too. I'm kind of excited. I just hope there aren't too many mirrors.

My car is finally back to its normal gorgeous self. It looks like nothing ever happened, and that's the way it should be. I like driving it around and since the weather is getting warmer I've been opening up the sunroof and blaring either Canon in D or latin music out for everyone to hear. I noticed my driving isn't as well as it was a month ago; I have to work on that again. I must learn patience.

Fortunately, though, I haven't been angry in the past month and half, not even with my sister! I usually get ticked off at her at least once a week. I cannot believe it -- I know my anger gene is still in there somewhere...there are times when I feel the blood starting to boil, but I have, so far, been able to simmer down rather quickly. This is really good news. I know I take after my father who is an emotional man with a quick temper...but I have made such amazing breakthroughs in the past 8 years and even more in the past month alone. I guess when there's a will, there's a way:)

Well, it's midnight, and I have to get up in 6 1/2 hours so I better get to bed. I'll write more later.

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