So I've been writing less lately. I think it's because I'm beginning to come out of my depression. I actually called up a friend and suggested that we go out tonight, and I haven't done that since January! I also think that the Reliv dietary supplements that James sent me are helping me immensely; I have so much more energy, my mood has picked up considerably, my body feels stronger and healthier...and I noticed when I was last at the gym that my muscles seemed to be working better as well. My sister and I played our version of Raquetball for about 45 min and then went to do our usual ellyptical work out. It didn't phase me at all; in fact, I was so engrossed in watching "Roseanne" while I was on the ellyptical that I didn't notice when my sister tapped me on the shoulder to tell me it was time to go.

I can tell a difference too, finally...especially in my lower legs. My calves are more shapely and my ankles are looking better. This is really great! I think the combination of more water, Reliv, and exercise is starting to make a difference. Knowing that my goal is beginning to be realized is such an amazing thing; plus the ability to actually feel happy again, to enjoy spending time with people, to be reminded of how beautiful I am, both inside and out, by truly awesome men, well...it just helps me so much.

I did do something stupid today, though. I'm on vacation; I took a week off just to sit around the house and get stuff done here. I totally redid my room and got rid of a lot of junk plus the mismatching furniture, and now it all matches and is much less cluttered. I've been cleaning, relaxing, baking, talking on the phone..and today I decided to take apart my dashboard and fix the stupid speedometer (and paint the needles to match my car). Stupid move. What a girl thing to do. I pride myself in my flowering mechanical abilities, and while I knew very well that I couldn't remove the needles (which I didn't), and that the needle on the speedometer shouldn't have been moved in the first place, I thought that by moving it "back" to where it was before it was moved a year and a half ago, I would fix it. Well, I think I made things worse *sigh*. Patrick told me I probably bent a lever on it, the ones behind the needle that move it. Plus since I had tampered with it a year and a half ago to put that silly gauge face overlay over the stock ones, I pretty much voided the warranty on that part. I called Saturn and told thim this, although I did mention that the speedometer itself was not touched and the needles were not removed, but they said they'd check, but my warranty was probably void. So if I need a new speedometer, the part alone is well over $300. UGH! I took it for a test drive and it seemed to still be "fast", and it's probably right around the same place it was, but I could be off even more than 6 mph now.

So that, on top of the gauge on my right hand door where someone keyed my car, have pretty much devalued the car considerably. I really don't want to trade it in and get another; I am halfway done with paying off this car, but seriously, for what I pay, I could get a brand new car with more options for less than what I'm paying now. That's what my Mom is doing. The new Saturns are so much cheaper than the older ones! It's just that my car is still pretty new! I just can't justify doing that...considering how I'm trying to save money. But if it meant lower monthly payments, 0% interest, and a new warranty (mine expires in 6,000 miles), it might be worth it. I guess I'll have to pray about it.

Well, I guess I'm going to go. I did a gorgeous website for James and his business, and I'm so darn proud of it:) It is soooo cool! I know I have a talent for this stuff, but I still feel like I'm in a waiting period in my life. I'm living it to its fullest, and trying my hardest to do so, but this isn't my calling! So I'm working on changing that as well.