Aug 5, 2004

I've never felt the dangerous power of the Adversary as I have as of late. I literally see and feel the destruction he is causing in the world and in my life. I am seeing his power in destroying relationships, building up mistrust and hatred, feeding upon low self-esteem, convincing me and the people that I love that they are worthless, that our sins are unforgivable, and that we do not merit the Redeeming love of our Savior. I see how he rejoices in our despair.

He is really trying to do all he can to destroy me and the people in my life. I have never before feared the Adversary's power, because I have always had more power to overcome him. But now seeing how he can influence well-intentioned people and subtly create havoc in my life and in my relationships is starting to scare me.

I know that Heavenly Father will protect me. I know I have the power of the Holy Ghost to help me. But to literally see the subtle cleverness and evil that the Adversary uses; to see how he can use good people to try to convince us that the ways of the Lord are in fact the wrong paths, to see how he will use these tactics to allow hatred, anger, and mistrust enter into our lives...well it's just too much.

I will fight him every step of the way. I knew my life would be like this, but the strongest tactic Satan has against me is my despair and my mistrust of myself and the promises of the Lord. I am sinking into despair; I feel like I cannot escape it, and that the darkness is too much. I see how he has ruined many of the good, righteous relationships I have by causing the same feelings to enter into their hearts as entered into mine.

But he WILL NOT WIN. I can recognize and discern him and his disciples from those of God, and I will NOT allow Satan to overcome me. It may mean I will stand alone in high may mean I will lose everything I hold dear and precious. BUT HE WILL NOT, and I repeat WILL NOT, win me. I am a DAUGHTER OF GOD, and I know who I am. I need to raise myself above this and also try as I can to help those others around me who are feeling the same influence.

God is my strength. Christ is my Redeemer and my Brother. Through them I will succeed.

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